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Daughter of an alcoholic

Posted by Lui on 22 April 2015.

I have grown up throughout my life with a father who's an alcoholic. My father has drank since I can remember and although has never been violent towards me, he never bothered with me and missed out on a lot in my life. My mum stuck by him through thick and thin, cleaning up the mess after him, urinated clothes and furniture. My father eventually had a stroke, hospitalising him, which gave him the opportunity to go onto a detox programme. He'd been to AA loads but had never stuck it, however with the detox and support from AA this time it worked.  He has now been dry for 3 years. I am still deeply hurt from how has been with both myself and my mum. As a result me and mum are the best of friends, a relationship now he can't handle. He is so jealous but equally is still so obsessed with himself and his addition I don't see how he'll ever be as close and how I could ever love him as I do my mum. He has now lost some weight is just horrible to mum, it's not my place to get involved but equally I hate seeing my mum so sad and him speaking to her like he used to when he drank. Any advice is warmly welcomed. X


Icarus Trust
11 May 2015

Hi Lui
it must be really hard for to cope with your feelings about your dad while continuing to support your mum.  If you would like to talk with someone who would understand how you are feeling The Icarus Trust is a charity that offers support for the friends and families of addicts. If you contact us we could put you in touch with one of our trained volunteers called 'family Friends'. They have lots of experience and would be able to listen and signpost you to what other help there is available. This is a free service so I hope you might give it a try.   
You can contact us on or visit the website
Good luck!

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