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fed up

Posted by when will it get better on 20 June 2015.

Today is a bad day my husband has been drinking since 3pm yesterday afternoon.when we spoke to his counsellor the other day he said its not uncommon for someone who knows that rehab is round the corner to have these binges but I need to rant. today so far we have had stupid behaviour crying about how he is an idiot to finally arguing about how its my fault (which I know its not) and now falling asleep on the sofa probably now till tomorrow I have had to come into the garden so that I don't have to look at him as when he is like this it is very hard to love him I really hope that his rehab works I know he wants it to because this is the last chance I haven't kicked him out before because I know he would drink himself to death and probably start taking drugs again but this time I feel different and i know that in 6 months time either I will have my husband sober or I will be 
A single parent either way life will be better than it is right now sorry if none of what I have written makes sense but just being able to get what I am feeling off my chest has made me feel better 😃 xx

Comments

Icarus Trust
23 Jun 2015

Don't forget there is support out there for yourself. You can talk to one of our 'Family Friends' at The Icarus Trust, and  having regular contact with one of them might help you to get things off your chest. They would understand what you are dealing with.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website www.icarustrust.org
I hope this might help.

foolish
23 Jun 2015

I know exactly how you feel - I am in almost the same position tonight except my partner did go through rehab and was sober for 5 months.  18 months later we seem to be back to square one and I  on the verge of ending our five year relationship.  Foolishly I moved from one end of the country to the other with my daughter thinking I was beginning a new life with a lovely kind honest man.  Within weeks I discovered he was drinking behind my back and have been trying to deal with a less than perfect situation ever since.  I am so ashamed I didn't spot it before I decided to move us in with him.  The promises are always there to stop for us but it doesn't happen. He even lost his job through drink driving and that didn't stop him.  I thought things were proving around March time when he started seeing a new councillor (3rd one) who he seemed to relate to more but but the lasting has been awful.  Trouble is I do love h and when sober he is kind, funny & loving.  My daughter adores him though she knows he has a drink problem.  She is aware he has started drinking again but not the extent.  I am feeling I can't cope with it anymore and have spent the evening working out my finances to see if I can as him to leave.  I am ashamed I have putyself and my daughter in this position so cover it most of the time.  I have recently discovered he has been emailing old girlfriends which he claims he did when he was drunk but at least I have a reason to give yup people if I ask him to leave. I feel very sad too as without the drink he is a good person and there was great potential for us as a family.  He has a daughter too and I feel bad for her as she has really benefited from us being up here and the two girls get on great.  I really feel it is the end now though.

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