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Posted by An on 25 November 2014.

Hi  I am a single mother of a 19 year addict son.  He has used for the past three years.  His drug of choice is meth.  He has been clean for 2 months.  He did it himself and I am very proud of him for that.  I kicked him out of my house September 1, 2014.  I lived for three years of what I considered close to hell.  I love my son so very much but I couldn't take it any longer.  He has been "couch hopping"   He has no place to call home. He is semi homeless.  I do not let him spend the night at my home.  I let him visit - but as hard as it is I make him leave.  My son is begging me to let him live with him again.  He swears he will be different than before.  He swears he will continue to be drug free.  He cries to me that he really needs his mom.  We have not living family for support.  He is truly alone.  I am not sure what to do.  Should I let him move back in with me.  Should I wait several more months to make sure he stays clean.  I CANNOT go back to the way it was when we lived together.  He stole everything of value I had.  He wrecked my house.  He had strangers constantly coming over.  He stole my car several times.   He stole my credit card several times.  He would leave sometimes for days at a time.  I would be a nervous wreck he was somewhere dead.  Please give me some advice .... Should I let him move back in or not ...... Thank you kindly .....

Comments

Icarus Trust
27 Nov 2014

Hi An,
I'm sorry that you are dealing with a really hard situation. You sound incredibly strong but are facing hard choices.
The Icarus Trust is a charity that offers one to one support from experienced trained volunteers (called Family Friends )who will talk things through with you. The family Friends have experienced living with addiction in their own families so it may help you to talk to someone who could share experiences and signpost you to help that is available.
Its a free service so should be worth a try.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website www.icarustrust.org
Good luck! I hope that you can find some support to help you deal with what you are going through.

CANT TAKE NO MORE
27 Nov 2014

Hi Ann, I am so sorry to read your story....it's hard. Frustrating,annoying and extremely frightening..I know because my son was the same...after 4 years I told my son not to contact me until he made better changes...that meant getting real help! He had no real place to go just like your son,but as hard as it was I just couldn't cope anymore...so my son went to a drug and alcohol centre, was assigned a counsellor, went to the Job centre, got himself a job and then rang me...that was. Early five months ago, and yes he has relapsed, 3 times, but after each time he's got back on the recovery road. It's not easy, he fights it every day, and has even got support from his doctor, and has also been assigned a psych  Counsellor. Them more people supporting him, the better his chances..I have been there every step of the way, BUT it was ultimately down to him. I'm in s couple of support groups, have read everything I can get my hands on to try to understand this terrible illness....you need just as much support as he does, but the biggest thing is remain strong...perhaps encourage him to seek professional help, because the brick wall will come, and it's at these times he will really need it......I cannot believe that for this moment in time my son has returned. To the caring, happy, loving son......but I know that can change in a minute . Only you know if it's right taking him back, but making it too easy for him isn't the answer..massive well done to your son for taking g the first positive steps of becoming drug free..hugs Hunni, here checking in most weeks if you need to chat xxxx

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