mmmmmmmmmmlli mmmmmmmmmmlli mmmmmmmmmmlli mmmmmmmmmmlli

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I can t cope any more with my son!

Posted by jake11 on 27 February 2014.

I m not sure where to start really but i have just had to get my 23 yo son removed from house as i can no longer cope with him, it s been going on for 9 years! i ve been there all the time for him with LOT S of love, care emotional/financial support etc. but i just lost it the other day. now I feel so guilty and sick as i m not sure where he is. I ve been told over the years that he needs tough love to get him back on track and i  could never do that to him. He has an opiate addiction but will not admit it! most of the substances he uses are LEGAL and when i ve tried to get help with it the drugs counsellors/GP haven t even heard of them! anyone aware of KRATOM, POPPY HEAD/SEED TEA? ;(

Comments

sad and tired
27 Feb 2014

I am so sorry, this is where I am with my son, I kicked him out for a week but was worried about where he was, when he text to come back I made it easy for him to get back, at least I know he is safe and eating.......I think sometimes that the more you do for them the less they care.  I believe we just have to go with it, there is nothing else you can do.  We are spectators in their awful lives..... good luck  xx

CANT TAKE NO MORE
2 Mar 2014

Aww feel for all us parents having to go through this hell....But the biggest thing for me is I am and have been his enabler..giving in, money, buying clothes , paying his debts etc.... well not anymore..I will not let him drag me down with him... Its hard, but my son is 23, and as such an adult...he makes his choices...the next thing for me is to kick him out....and the way I feel at the moment, It wont be long!!! Be strong. and look after YOU....its their choice what they put in their bodies....its their consequences....but its still our hearts that get broken! Im so glad I found this site....just talking makes me feel I am not alone...so if I can support someone else along the way, its all good.....take care all you mums and dads, and partners of users....xxxx

sad and tired
2 Mar 2014

yes it comes as a shock to realise all the times you thought you were being a good mum and helping them out with cash they were just using us.  What you have said is exactly how I feel, I cant let my 22 year old son drag me down with him, I have worked hard all my life, its not right and its not fair that I now have to use my cash to line dealers pockets.
It is very hard to kick them out, I have tried and he gets abusive and short of getting him by the scruff of the neck how do I do it.  I managed to get him out a while back for a week but he did try getting back in by hammering on the door and putting his foot in.  its just a nightmare that I want to end, I want my son back.  xxxx

kelsey
9 Mar 2014

hi, ive heard of this tea! well seen it actually. I discovered my now ex partners addiction a few months ago. same as your son opiate addiction. He has admitted to the problem but is not at present ready to get help. I had the experience of having to tell his family of his problem as I couldn't cope with it on my own and kept thinking if anything happened to him I would never forgive myself for not trying to get him help and support, also being a support for the family as well as naturally they are shocked and frightened. Although this addiction has effectively ruined our relationship I cant turn my back on him and feel now he has a good support network in place. We are all scared, worried and at a loss as to what to do. I found out that the tea was opium tea after he was making it in the house and telling me it was herbal. I found the poppy heads hidden I didn't have a clue what they were and when he explained he was very casual about it as if it was a normal thing to do!!, my medication has gone missing and I know  I have to start tough love as he sees me as a source for pills. im absolutely drained by the whole situation, I am currently keeping his prescription and handing the correct dosage on a daily basis but im not sure this is the best way of doing things. he knows if he has them in his hands he will take dangerous levels of them. this last few months have been awful and uncovering the lies and deceit absolutely devastating.

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