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just tired of it all

Posted by exhausted on 4 March 2015.

Nearly a year ago i found 60 cans of beer in the recycling.  for years my husband has drunk more than what i would have liked, but this was the catalyst.  The next 3 months were hell with him lying to me about whether he had brought drink. He would not see anyone so i told him if he did not reduce the alcohol he had to leave.  By the August things were so much better.  he would have 6 bottles (cans are banned) on sat and the same on sunday.  the one problem is that every morning he has a bottle of beer not when he comes home from work but in the morning.  Then a couple of weeks ago alarms started to ring and i started to check the garbage etc again.  Nothing until 2 days ago when i found 4 cans hidden.  I am so exhausted of trying to be a good mum, trying to support my husband, hold down a full time job and be everything else.  Typing this i feel so depressed but i have to be strong for my son.  He is a lovely man but he has issues with drink.  He goes 24hrs without a drink so why one in the morning?  he says its a like a security blanket from when he had a panic attack on the way to work.  Am i asking to much?  maybe i am.  If we go out as a family which is not often he would not be able to go without having a drink first which is why i go with my son on my own or with my mum.  We do not holiday together anymore because he drinks from morning to dusk, i would rather go on my own.

Comments

Icarus Trust
7 Mar 2015

I'm sorry to read your story and how your husband's drinking is affecting you. Sadly there are many people like you who are trying to support a loved one with an addiction which is a really hard thing to do. If you would like some support for yourself, The Icarus Trust we can offer you our 'family Friends' service. This is a free service of trained volunteers who are experienced in talking to people who are in similar situations to yourself. It might help you to offload how you're feeling to someone who would understand and they may be able to signpost you to what other help could be available if you want it.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website www.icarustrust.org
I hope that this helps. Good luck!

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