mmmmmmmmmmlli mmmmmmmmmmlli mmmmmmmmmmlli mmmmmmmmmmlli

for
families

We care, for the better.

A place for families, because you don't have to use drugs to be affected by them.

sign in

Sign in to make comments and contribute your own stories. Or click here to register if you've never used the blog before.

Sign In

Want to find a support group? Enter your postcode or town below to find a support group near you.

Find help

Share Your Story

Letdown...

Posted by Nowhere to turn on 16 August 2013.

My husband of only 3 months is an alcoholic! He had spent most of last year in & out of hospital, with variceal bleeds, two of which nearly killed him. In February of this year, a shunt was put into his Liver, to prevent further bleeds. Throughout all of this, he never drank any alcohol! Over the past 3 months, his drinking has increased, on a daily basis. Following a week long "bender" I finally convinced him to see our GP, he was prescribed anti depressants, as he says he only drinks when he is feeling low (i don't believe this to be true) & refused to attend or seek advice from a support group. He can go weeks without a drink but as soon as he has one..it spirals out of control. What I want to do is throw him out...I feel so angry, hurt, let down, after everything we've been through he's still prepared to put his life at risk? But he has nowhere to go, family are all overseast, no money as he's not working! I really don't know where to go from here...I can't sleep, eat, this is tearing me apart but everything seems to revolve around him & what he's been through! I feel as though I've supported him through everything, emotionally, financially, I'm not sure I've got anything left to give...& then I read how some of you guys have lived with this for 30 odd years & I feel such a failure...

Comments

Sad and lonely....
20 Aug 2013

I understand....I am in a similar situation (read my blog, I know what to do....). My husband will not stop drinking, he thinks he can control it but he can't. I know I have to end my marriage but I feel like I have failed. Also like you, if I kick him out he really has none else to turn to and we've no money to support a second home, even a bedsit. Like you, I have read things and been to Al Anon only to hear tales from people that have suffered for years living with an alcoholic. I want hope, I want someone to tell me that there is help out there and that things can work out, but I'm kidding myself, right? I'm new to this and sharing things isn't easy but I can empathise with you so I hope in some small way this has helped.

anarette
2 Nov 2014

Hi I know you posted a while back but Im new here so reading through posts.I understand about the health problems as my husband had oesophageal bleeding and had hep c and cirrhosis and now has started taking heroin again.
Its a hopeless situation.I feel for you.But at this stage I cant watch while he kills himself.Like you my husband and know one and no family .If I kick him out he will go to a homeless shelter and will probably give up all hope and die.But I cant watch him commit suicide and bury him.I will feel partly responsible for his death in that I made him comfortable to keep taking drugs.Its a tragedy for you .Im so sorry for your heartbreak.Death is permanent and final .That is why you are hanging on cos you know there is no hope after death.Your husband is killing himself .If he carries on drinking you know he wont live long.
You must decide what you want todo.You can either be there for him at the end or leave him now before it reaches that point.
The fact that his health problem doesn't scare him to stop means that he has given up hope to some extent.
If you love him and you have the strength to do it then be by his side ,show him love and care ,come to terms with his weakening condition and be there for him . If you don't have the strength then part ways now before it gets any worse.I understand how you feel because my husband is also having liver disease and is very ill .Sometimes when it is this bad , only an epiphany of some kind can wake them up.It has happened but its rare.I hope your husband will have a wake up call and save himself .Take it easy on yourself.hugs

You must be signed in to comment. To sign in, use the form to the right, or click here to register if you've never used the blog before.

Submit