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Living on my nerves and ready to explode

Posted by concerned mum on 13 April 2014.

Oh my god now I really dont know what to do....Today I took my toddler shopping with me in our local town on leaving a particular shop I spotted my son heading into the local bookies so i called him, asked him if hed eaten today he pulled twenty pound out of his pocket and said not yet....I told him not to blow it in bookies he swore he would nt.

I left him carried on with my shopping and ten minutes later bumped into him again with which i was greeted "get me a drink will u mom"  no please...Immediately my hackles went up asked him where his twenty pound was to which he replied hed lost it in bookies.  I was furious and gave him a lecture on the value of money to which i got f...off ur a sxxx fxxxing mother.

I still offered him a can of pop which i had just purchased he started swearing again all in front of his toddler brother.  so i told him i was nt tolerating this kind of talk to me or in front of his brother and i walked off.

All of this abuse boils down to the fact i did nt give him cash to replace what he had just squandered if its not alcohol its drugs and now clearly gambling also.

I have got home to this test..
"Fxxxx u im ending it watch"

Im so worried he not answering his phone but he has threatened this before in similar circumstances...I feel like im living on my nerves

Comments

CANT TAKE NO MORE
13 Apr 2014

Switch your phone off, lock your door and let him get on with it...Whilst you continue to enable him, you will continue to get the abuse....Its unfair that your little one has to be party to his behaviour and cruel words....I know only too well, as my little one has heard stuff too....DONT give in, and stop phoning him.....Its hard, very hard, but most people who wnat to end it, dont text or tell anyone....what he is doing is manipulating...your son , my son and other parents sons and daughters on drugs all do it......cause they know it hits your heart and you may cave in and give them what they want...DONT.......Massive hugs hunni, sending you lots of strength and luv xxxxxx

concerned mum
13 Apr 2014

Thank you so much for your support...Im new to this site and have battled stuff like this alone for nearly two years... ...he is so nasty it seem to be getting worse not only for him but for me also...I really am starting to feel like he is wearing me down...I try to battle on and keep a brave face for my younger son but sometimes all i want to do  is burst into tears

CANT TAKE NO MORE
14 Apr 2014

Im past that stage hunni....wish id known about this page a long time ago.......the strength I get form others keeps me going....I take myself off to another place (in my head) when it all gets ontop of me, and have learned to switch off....there is nothing I can say or do that will make him change....that is the hardest thing for any mother to hear and know....ITs up to them...dont get dragged down with it!!! xxxx

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