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My daughter is killing hersef

Posted by Anne1 on 24 August 2015.

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Hi my name is Anne and I'm 50+ years old
I have 4 grown up children married and left home. I had a fantastic job until last year when I had to give it up as I now have 3 grandchildren living with me and am an approved kinship carer for them as both their parents are addicted to heroin and crack cocaine. My story begins in 1997 when my eldest daughter got mixed up with an elder boy. She was 15 he was 21.i tried to put a stop to the relationship as I heard he was on heroin and at that time i didn't know anything about drugs.she wouldn't listen and she disapeared with him and we were at our wits end. Cut a long story short, she ended up marrying him and was expecting a baby.while carrying the baby, I was told she was taking drugs too, they denied it but she looked I'll and her skin was transparent, so I knew something wasn't right and her bump wasn't getting bigger.we had a call from her one day crying and said the GPs was worried about the baby not growing properly.she would come to my place, I'd feed her up, buy shopping and she assured me she wasn't taking drugs.baby was born, all ok until I heard that my daughter had a black eye and that her husband had been beating her up.i eventually persuaded her to leave him and we took care of her and the baby.
She eventually got back with him and it all went down hill, more drugs and more beatings. Eventually, Ss got involved and I took care of the baby, by now she was 3 and a half years old.my daughter finally left her husband and took my daughter to church and was doing well.so as I thought. She started drinking and got back on drugs.for me to keep my grants child? I had to kicky daughter and alcoholic husband out my home.i moved away with my youngest son and grandchild and made a new life for us. I found outy daughter was shop lifting and went to prison to my delight as I knew she was safe and her chance to get detoxed.she came out clean,et seone else and eventually had her child back living with her again.my grandaughter wAs now 6 years old.my daughter got married and had two ore children and everything seemed fine and all was going well.2013 I got a txt from my grandaughter who was now 13, telling me to ce and get her coz she can't take anymore.to my horror, my daughter was back on drugs and prostituting herself for drugs. I felt my world fall apart again.i kidnapped my grandaughter and brought her back with me and we lived on edge for a while as we got threatened by her mum and step dad.the police was involved, questioned my grandaughter and could see I was not holding her against her will.we were concerned for the other two children but I thought their father would take care of them so I wasn't over concerned for them until the bomb shell came that he too had turned to drugs and was in denial.then one day I had a call to say that the kids were taken into care, swiped away from the school gates.i couldn't believe what was happening.you can imagine what me and my family felt like.anger, sadness and so many mixed emotions, we were devastated.anyway, I was assessed and approved to look after the children.i now am taking care of my 3 grandchildren and it has been a roller coaster of a time to pick up the pieces of these poor children who have experienced trauma and were nearly starved to death with no food in the cub bards , witnessed violence, threats, strangers in and out the house, domestic violence, abuse and common neglect.the parents are still on drugs, crack, heroin and what ever is available to them.my daughter is a walking skeleton, a shadow of the beutiful girl I once knew as my daughter.i try not to think of her as when I do, all sorts of things go throughly head and my imagine runs wild and I'm ill for days.she is suppose to be going to rehab but that is probably a lie as I can't believe a word she says.now and again,me and my girls buy them food, tobacco and put money on the electric and gas key, and on no account will give her money.i pray for her every day and night that she sees since but mostly I pray that I don't get a call to say she is dead, as her health is deteriating fast and where she has injected, her veins have collapsed.
This is my story
Thank you for listening
Anne1

Comments

AdfamAdmin
25 Aug 2015

Adfam are sorry for the unfortunate circumstances you have ended up in and thank you for sharing your story. If you live in London you may be eligible for the older careers project, to find out more information click the link (http://www.adfam.org.uk/professionals/latest_information_and_events/current_projects/older_carers) If you are based in Peterborough, we run a support service for family, friends and kinship carers, you can find more information here (http://www.adfam.org.uk/families/more_help/support_family_friends__carers_peterborough). 
If you are not based in either of these locations there are other organisations which may help you Grandparents Plus, Grandparents Association and Family Rights Group. These organisations are easily found on Google. 
We hope this has been helpful and if you need any further information do not hesitate to email admin@adfam.org.uk.

Hopefull
6 Nov 2015

Anne1 I can relate to your story. Take any and all the support thats out there. Take care of yourself.xx

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