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my partner of 15 years a drug addict

Posted by jojo19854 on 25 September 2014.

Myself and my partner have been together for 15 years and have 4 beautiful children he started using when my daughter was born in 2003 it was only social then and didn't bother me all too much but over the years it has regulated and much of the blame is all my fault he is now totally addicted to speed he takes it all the time and gets no sleep and does not eat which obviously has put a massive strain on us as a family I feel so alone I have friends that support me but no one will ever stand up to him as he can be a bully not even his family will say anything I try all the time but just get accused of nagging him and I want him to stop fore and I am selfish he needs serious help as it is affecting his health massively he can't remember anything anymore and he acts very strange after a few days it is like he goes into his own world he will dissapear for hours with no phone or money and drive around he is always unsettled which unsettles the whole household I am so mad at him for putting us through everything but he needs help he will not admit the problem he has as he likes to pass the blame to me and say if I wasn't the way I was then he wouldn't do it bit I think in my situation anyone would get fed up I do everything at home I work and look after 4 children do all school runs too he does nothing he can't even hold down a job I just need to know what to do also the home we live in is in his name so I can't just go either I am so torn he needs help but I feel so alone I hope there is someone that can relate to me thanx for reading x

Comments

Icarus_Trust
26 Sep 2014

Hi Jojo,

I'm so sorry, that just sounds tragic.  I know you're friends help you you, but you can get support from people who have been in similar situations, and you can relate to them.  They are called Family Friends, and are volunteers with The Icarus Trust.  There is no charge for having someone to speak to.  You can contact them on their website www.icarustrust.co.uk or contact them on info@icarustrust.org.

I hope you find someone you can relate to.

CANT TAKE NO MORE
26 Sep 2014

Hi jojo...firstly the only person to blame is the person addicted, and addicts love to blame everyone but themselves....and the only person who can really help them is themselves....living around an addict is like walking on egg shells, and the worst kind of living...mainly because you get drawn into their pain,anger, despair! Loving an addict I'd the hardest thing, but there is help for families...just talking to others is a godsend...I found this page around 8 months ago and had just stopped enabling my son...that meant no help at all...no money, not living with us, and only getting our cooperation and support when he made the decision to get help...he has had one relapse in around 9 weeks, started work which he loves, and generally trying to continue on Hispano to sobriety...it's hard, and heart breaking turning your back on your son, but it gave him the wake up call....he could relapse at any time, but he knows with our support his counsellor and really trying he has a chance....in your case your children and you are what's important...please think about the effect this will be having on them.",massive hugs to you Hun, and I really hope he can fight his addiction before it's too late...hugs Hunni xxx

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