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The dreaded phone Call........ :(

Posted by Louise30 on 9 January 2015.

" Mummy you and Daddy built me, why can't we build him again"
That's our 4yr old Daughter, it's been 15weeks today I got that dreaded phone call to say he was found dead, no point sugar coating things as the reality of Drug addiction is heartbreaking, soul destroying , devastating and my god a lonely place. He was 34 and always up for a party but for some reason the party never seemed to stop his drug of choice was cocaine..... No one I have ever known had died from this so why would it ever catch up with him, I tried soooooooo many times to help but in the end I gave up because he was just having a good  time, so he said......the party finally ended on the 26th  September 2014  he was Alone I'm sure scared  and on a public footpath , I'm still not sure of the full details as the toxicology reports come back next month, but my reason for sharing my story is the one little person who deserved so much more from let's face it her Daddy as he never thought it would happen to him, she is the absolute  image of her Dad so she will never forget him as she only has to look in the mirror......it's the whirlwind of emotions that are left behind....so anyone Reading this please stop and think for one minute how it effects the rest of someone else's life...this is the end of  mine and our Daughters family story as we have lost our 3rd  musketeer  but I have  no doubt in my mind if he knew what he knew now he would have changed it in a heartbeat!  Lou

Comments

Icarus Trust
12 Jan 2015

Hi Louise,
I am so sorry to read your heart breaking story. This must be very very tough for you and your daughter. As you say the awful effects of addiction goes much wider than the addicts themselves. 
I really hope that you have people around you to help, but If you would like any other support please contact The Icarus Trust. We are a charity which tries to help the families and friends of addicts.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website www.icarustrust.org
All the very best to you and your daughter.

hope/faith
25 Feb 2015

Hi, very true words spoken. My heart goes out to you and your Daughter, your a very brave lady.  I to dread that phone call and yes my partner believes it will never happen to him, he to has a beautiful Daughter who is growing into a young lady, he also has 2 stepsons one of them who would go to the end of the earth for him, I just hope he comes to his senses before its to late, I know this is a terrible thing to say but at times I feel we've already lost him.  Take care my thoughts are with you xxx

Louise30
13 Mar 2015

Thank you for your words of Support, it's 6 months today and honestly it's not any easier you just somehow when doing the dishes or hoovering think of what your actually doing!!! The toxicology reports came back and sure enough it was a heart attack.
I had always had a strained relationship with his mother, infact so did he but I would say it's worse then ever now as guilt has a funny way of rearing it's ugly head at times like this, she decided to scatter her sons ashes without our daughter,people could say she was to young but it did not have to be done so soon,so I'm not actually sure where he is, sad thing is I think she still wants to remember him as her 14yr old boy not a grown man with a family of his own :( !!!!
Lou x

Icarus Trust
23 Mar 2015

Really sad for you Louise! 
Don't forget The Icarus Trust if you want to talk to anyone about how you are feeling.
All the best to you.

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