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will my son ever stop his drug habit?

Posted by A Parent with hope on 23 June 2013.

I cannot believe the amount of stories I have read, is there really that many parents that have similar problems with their children? I have searched and searched for help, such as rehab, somewhere my son can find the tools to help himself. 

My son is now 20, I realised he was dabbling with weed when he was about 14. He promised me he would stop. By the time he reached 16,  he was dabbling in pills, mdma & cocaine. We are now 20 and we are no longer dabbling, he is now a regular user of cocaine.   

His lifestyle has been tearing our family apart. There seems to be one drama after another. The last drama was when he was hospitalised after taking 4 LSD tabs. He came home at 8am on a Sunday morning, I woke up to noises and banging,  I got up to find our huge fish tank smashed, fish flapping around on the floor, glass everywhere. my son was running around with his trousers round his ankles. I couldn't quiet fathom out what had happened for the first 5 minutes. I just kept screaming at him saying wot happened? He ran out the house, striped off naked and ran round the streets. by this point I was hysterical realising that he had lost the plot, and taken something. I called the police, they came within minutes. I just could not believe what was happening, after 10 mins of him running around naked he came home ran past police and they managed to handcuff him. 

This was like something out of the movies. My husband & daughter have practically disowned him. I am now piggy in the middle, I love my son so much and cannot kick him out. This is the most recent drama however I have so many and I would be here all night. 

He has had Wonga loans, he has debts up to his eyeballs and the loan sharks just keep lending to feed his habit. I have tried so many places for help and just feel like nothing has worked. 

He has stayed in for 5 weeks and sat in his bedroom everyday and night, to stay away from the drugs. As soon as he feels strong he goes out and the vampires pounce and  tick him drugs again. Its as if he cannot get away from it.        

I have got so much more to say but I am so bored going round and round in circles. I never thought in a million years that drugs would ever be a part of my families life. I just wish there was more that us parents could do to help or more help other than counselling, groups, acupuncture!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel more money needs to be spent on prevention and intervention when  you realise your child is on drugs. I believe that if the doctor or school had helped early on maybe I would not be using this blog now.

I hate walking on egg shells on a daily basis, I hate that my husband wants my son to leave, I hate that my daughter looks down at her brother. 

All I want is for my son to be well and stop. Every night I lie in bed wondering if I am going to get a call to say his dead. My anxiety levels where extreme until my doctor prescribed citrolpram & now they are manageable.

Comments

lexy
3 Jul 2013

my heart goes out to you. I am in a very similar situation only my son is seventeen and a half has been out of control using ketamin for a year. Two years sporadic before that. He has been in Hospital twice, where i found him semi conscious. he has stolen and takes it most days though denies it even when i catch him in the act. I am torn , to throw him out or not. I am also on medication due to it and last yr had a breakdown. i recently found a support group for families of drug and alchol addicts. It is time we tried to look after ourselves, as this disease of theirs will destroy us, if we dont get support.  we can not stop them using, only look after ourselves. we are also someones children and deserve some peace in life.

AmandaA
11 Oct 2013

Hi ladies my son is 22 and an addict. He has torn my life apart for over 7 years.  I am at the point where i dont know who i am anymore.  He hasnt lived with us for a long time and doesnt know where we are.  I have been subjected to trauma after trauma.  Its taken me all this time to find the courage to get some help for me.  My son is homeless, has no friends, no money.  He bullies me daily and i have finally decided to change my number and take control.  Its tough beyond tough.   I hope your situations are improving. xx

jay
31 Oct 2013

I don't know whether to feel comforted by the fact that so many other parents are in the same position as me, or distraught by it. My son is 17 and a half too. He admits to cannabis use but i strongly believe there is more to it than that. he is so thin, barely eats, never sleeps, only wants sugary foods. His moods are extreme and his latest "best mate" is a 46 year old man who lives alone and doesnt work. I've tried going to his dad for help, but he is completely blind to what is happening and told my son to ignore me as i'm clueless. Ive tried my GP but was told they cant help unless he stops using drugs. What are we supposed to do? My heart goes out to you, because like me, you want to do more than read pamphlets and talk, you want to do something or get some help and it's just not out there. xx
I hope your son wakes up and comes to you for help. I hope you have someone there to support you xx

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