Talk about your experiences with others.

Posts by Ash2013

joined

33 posts in 14 threads

Addicted & Scared by

Hi Paolo, I didnt want to read and run as it sounds like you are struggling. Start by deleting dealers numbers, sorry, but you'll have to change your circle of friends, as I imagine you've surrounded yourself with like minded people, stop drinking too as you'll never stop if you carry on drinking, it lowers your guard. Believe me when I say, life will be easier, more enriched and you will be a much better father to your girls and a much better husband to your wife than you are now. Focus on them, keep occupied with them, throw yourself into family and work. Its hard to stop, but my husband is 6 months clean after 20 years mostly on the stuff (with differing levels of use) This site is good for offering support and seeing it from the side of the people the addiction is affecting, which believe me, will be far worse than you realise. Keep in touch.

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Cocaine every day! by

Hi PokerFace, Do you have a positive support network around you, positive relationships, I'd guess probably not because my husband sounds like you (well he's 6 months clean) but your story is similar, and believe me when I say, all those so called mates that hang around you, wont be there when you are clean, BUT the best mates who are true friends, see the change in you and support you, will be the people you need. I was at the end of my tether with my husband, it wasnt the money, he could afford it. It was the UTTER disregard to anybody elses feelings aside his own. Staying out all night, phone off, working late, the agressive mood he'd return in if I dared to ask questions about his whereabouts. He didnt care about me, or his kids, his parents had started to notice, people he worked with were on the verge of leaving because they didnt want to work in an environment where coke users/dealers were frequent visitors, he couldn't be bothered to do anything. 6 Months clean and he's a different person, he has motivation, he has drive, he has love to give and we love him! Taking the first step in admitting you have a problem is the hardest. There was nothing I could have said to my husband to make him stop, even ending up in hospital after an overdose because I couldn't see a way out of this s**t life didn't stop him. This cocaine fuelled world is good for nobody, not you and not the people around you. Take a step back, not high, not on a come down, and think how much more fulfilling life could be without being a slave to it. Good luck x

Cocaine took the love of my life by

Hi Lost4words, I would probably hazard a guess that the 'not high' partner you know and care for still loves you, but the 'high' partner loves someone else. There isnt a lot you can do about it though, and nothing, not even your son, is enough to keep him. He might wake up one day and realise that he's lost the best thing thats ever happened to him, but you shouldn't put your own life on hold waiting for that time to come, if it ever does. Probably while he's still using it won't, and at a guess his new woman probably uses too. Its painful to see, its gut wrenching, I get that. But honestly, keep doing what you are doing, find happiness, let him see his son when he wants to and as long as you know he's not high when doing so. It's not your problem to solve, and you wont solve it, it will tear your heart out over and over again. Sending love

Looking for advice by

Assuming he's with other people when using, he's probably too busy chatting to be on his phone. My husband used to be the same when he was using. He would be on his phone a lot day to day, but then not when high/out. Its because they have something else to do. One of the other things I found out, was that he was spending a lot of time messaging the other woman, but wasnt online because he was with her! But thats only my experience, i'm not suggested you're in the same boat with that one. Sending love x

Had enough of cocaine! Coming off here for 5 week at least. by

Don't beat yourself up, you are stronger than you think. Your gf should know better than to allow people in the house who have it/take it, let alone those willing to wave it in front of you. TBH I'd kill anyone who did that in my house in front of my husband who is a recovering addict. I was even mad when one of his mates came over the other day and had been using, although I know he didnt do any while here, as he couldnt wait to leave after a couple of hours! Keep on the good path! You are better than this.

Just when you think things cannot get any worse ....... by

A good rant helps me too. Well he's definitely paranoid. I felt like I was being watched because if I had done something it would make him feel better if I was. Sad state of affairs - pardon the pun! Sounds like your husband might be borderline personality disorder, believe me I have looked everywhere for answers as to why my husband was so intently confident that I was having an affair, to the point where it didn't matter what I said, he just knew I was, even though I wasnt. There is such a thing as cocaine induced psychosis, tbh I think thats what my husband had, because no sane person would act like he did. I hope you have a quiet weekend - I used to dread Fridays and Saturdays, they were the worst, out all night, AWOL, phone off. Lol'd at your last sentence, bet he'd never leave, mine wouldn't despite the fact he hated me for 'trying to control him', he just wanted to stick around and make my life miserable instead. Meanwhile having his kicks elsewhere. I think thats called having your cake and eating it!! xx

Young People Dealing With Addiction by

Danman is right, you can't drink at all. It makes you weak, when at other times you can feel strong, it lowers your guard. So whilst you might not have a drink problem, the two things go hand in hand. Russell Brand is a good listen I agree, I listened to him and tried to get my husband to listen to him, but he thinks he's a bit loopy. He also thinks that heroin is worse, so its not the same.... physically maybe, but mentally coke is just as bad. People underestimate its power, its a sly drug that pulls you in and turns you into a different person. You need some support, do you have siblings, or mates that don't use?

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