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Diphenhydramine hell

Posted by MarshMallow on 30 March 2018.

My Nytol Hell (Diphenhydramine)

Thinking the other day about what was the lowest point in my life. I had to really think hard because there has been so many. There have been some equally high points in my life to I but I'll come to that later. I want to talk you about my lowest point, made one hell if a lot worse from drug and substance abuse  one of these substances nearly ended my life. It is readily available and it seems that it has slipped under the radar in terms of well known substance and alcohol abuse. People just don't know. I'd like to make people aware. 
Around 7 years ago I became addicted to a pharmacy over the counter medication called Nytol. It's an antihythamine, active ingredient DiphenHydramine.
At the time I was also taking other drugs including heroin crack ketamine benzos, basically anything I could get my hands on. My downstairs neighbours 'ran' a crack Den. I got my drugs and substances from them. I would also join them regularly to get stoned. Originally I used nytol to help me sleep but soon found that rather than make me sleep instead it sorta disengaged my brain, it put me in a Kinda stasis. It rendered me speechless and made it difficult to think properly. After dosing, the 'trip' lasted around 4 hours. I enjoyed this experience because it would give me a break from anxiety and racing thoughts from my bipolar disorder. It was like putting my mind into a neutral Gear. It usually took 20 minutes to start working and the beginning of the trip was heralded by blurred vision. The next stage was a feeling of complete lethargy and I'd have to lie down for the entire trip which lasted for around 4 hours. I remember thinking to myself that this stuff is for sleeping but I would just lie there in a zombie state with my mouth open not sleeping at all. But completely relaxed and not thinking. The only time that I would get up was for a pee which was a great inconvenience I can tell you.
 When I first started taking nytol I found taking the double instructed use would suffice to obtain that disengaged feeling. It wasn't long before soon my tolerance to nytol increased and I was taking more and more everyday. Because nytol made it virtually impossible to engage with people I restricted my use two evenings only just in case my family or so called friends called me. 
It was my secret nobody but me knew about it. 
Diphenhydramine sleeping medication is manufactured by a number of companies I would prefer to get the generic brands as they contained 20 tablets rather than the 16 of nytol. 
Before long I was having to take a whole box to gain the same effect, that was 20 tablets and by then I was extending my trip 2/8 hours which meant I had to buy two boxes which is 40 tablets which is 2000mg enough to kill a man.
I noticed in higher doses the nytol brought other unwanted side effects such as nonexistent people who I would talk to. 
I was convinced that there was somebody there that I knew, one of my friends sat in my front room. I even made a nonexistent person a cup of tea on one occasion.
As you can imagine getting hold of this volume my 'medication' would take a lot of ingenuity. I became well known at a lot of pharmacies but often that didn't stop them from selling it to me. I got to know all the faces of the staff in the chemists. They would give me a scripted speech about how nytol was only a one time measure for sleep problems and that it was addictive and that I should see my doctor if my sleep problems continue. I don't think that the pharmacies had a clue that DiohrenHydrimine abuse exsisted.   I used to alternate which chemist i used. Eventually I started travelling outside my home City to nearby cities to buy it. I even started paying people to buy for me including my neighbours that 'ran' the crack then downstairs. Often I would get ripped off and get into physical fist fights as a result. Desperate to get hold of my daily quantities of nytol. I started taking ever increasing amounts. After 6 months of taking nytol when I was well stocked up often I would spend 24 hours stoned and in a zombie state. My eyesight started deteriorating but I didn't think to get glasses. If I really needed to read something that was important I would have to use a magnifying glass or use my phone to magnify what I was trying to read. 
The trips varied in intensity and I couldn't put my finger on exactly why. Some days I would dose the same amount of tabs and experienced and mild trip then other days I would take the same amount of tablets and be completely off my face for hours. Often when I was like this I would fall over, pee myself and being a complete mess. There where times when their effects was so strong I thought I would die my heart would be hammering and thumping out of my chest. Yet I still continue to take it. I was so used to being under the influence of this substance that the fear of Being 'Sober' would frighten me. It sounds crazy doesn't it. 
Eventually that lowest point arrived. I was fed up sick of this lifestyle.  DiohrenHydrimine had affected my ability to wee there were times where I go 24 hours without going to the toilet. I just couldn't go. On one occasion I had to visit accident and emergency and they fitted me with a catheter. This suited me fine because I could attach the night bag and lie stoned and lie on in my bed for huge periods of time without having to get up to go to the toilet. I develop bed sores. On one night my downstairs neighbour from the crack Den came to check if I wanted any nytol. Of course they were helping me. I got up out of my bed went to the door and started to collapse. I was crashing around my hallway dressed only in my dirty underwear, trailing a catheter bag behind me. I fell over and landed on the catheter bag and and burst it. My neighbour looked shocked and horrified at the state that I was in. Things we're getting really bad and I'd had enough. That night I obtained large amounts of heroin ketamine and plenty of nytol and took the lot. I thought there is no way that I would wake up after taking such huge amounts. ...I did. I woke up in hospital a month in the intensive care unit. They had to revive me. They couldn't wake me up. As a result I damage my so leg badly and very nearly lost it. It took me months to learn how to walk properly again. The night that I got out of hospital I went straight to the crack Den and started smoking crack. Then all of a sudden I had a realisation. What was I doing? I nearly died. How do i to stop this this endless abuse if body and mind. This was the turning point for me and I saw how crazy and desperate my life would become and decided to take it in hand. Everyone has this moment of realization at some pount, It just depends on wether you heed it or not.  Nytol had a psychological addiction but not a physical addiction but it was equally as hard to break the Habit but I did break it in the end. I became involved with a local drug agency called SDAS in Bath. They were anazing. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't have managed to get off all these substances I owe them my life. 


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Comments

Icarus Trust
23 Apr 2018

Thank you for posting your story and the warning you have given about the dangers around the use of Nytol. It's so good to read that after all you've been through  you have managed to get off the drugs.
 Good luck with everything!

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