Hi CurlyC
Thank you for sharing how you are feeling over the loss of your brother. I feel so sad for you. It is such a hard thing to come to terms with.
May be talking with people who understand what you and your brother have gone through might help you make sense of what’s happened. I work for a charity called The Icarus Trust which is there to support people dealing with the impact of a loved one’s addiction. If you think it would help to talk with one of our experienced, trained people please get in touch.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
Hoping that this is useful Good luck.