I feel the same.
Me and my boyfriend have been together since we were 14, and I honestly could not be without him and I know he feels the same.
I felt like that too, when he went to rehab we drew a line under everything. I may of not got all the answers I wanted or felt I needed to know but I had the mindset of this is my new life and he is on track and things were amazing.
Now we’ve had a few bumps in the road, all the questions and feelings have come back. I have so many questions I want to ask him but I feel I can’t – it makes me so paranoid.