Hi plainjane.
I was also new to this forum a few months ago and it has been huge support to me speaking to other people who understand as i was in the same situation as you and couldn’t speak to any friends or family. I was at a point where i didn’t know where to turn.
I have children myself and knew very little about drugs before things unfolded. I knew my partner had taken cocaine socially, but i thought it was all in the past and he promised me he was clean. I told him then how i felt about it. Anyway fast forward a few months and its ruined everything. He was actually an addict and has been for 16 years, i had no idea for which i feel absolutely stupid for. I ignore my instincts. He too would complain about hayfever, even got medication from dr for it. The drug turns them into very clever liars. Hes now very honest and open with me but has lost everything, i made him move out.
I really hope you put yourself and your children first in such a difficult situation for you all, because im afraid when they are using it doesnt seem to get better only worse.
Take care