Hi liberty, hope your doing okay today.
It wasn’t just the one thing that got me to a stage where I had had enough. I was fed up with the same thing day in and day out. I had taken 2 overdoses and had 3 ligature attempts within 10 days to just try to end the way I was feeling. I also used to sit on my own thinking about the things I’d lost, relationships I’d ruined, friendships I’d destroyed and I was sick of never having a penny to do anything with the people who were still supporting me and not drug users. The things I was trying to get away from are still being dealt with in the present day and probably will be something I deal with for a long time to come. I am just dealing with them rather than just trying to forget or runaway from them. Also before I relapsed I was the happiest I’ve been in a long long time. I was experiencing pleasure from the everyday things that people get joy from. I don’t remember being able to smile about anything whilst I was using.