Get help now. There is no shame in addiction and there are plenty of avenues to explore. Look at “turning point” they are a great place to start.
Like Kellie, I am on the other side of this and am devastated by the way alcohol and coke have changed him and continue to be more important than me or his children.
Do it for you and do it for anyone who loves you. Good luck and well done. My partner still can’t see there is a problem. You are so much if the way there already. See it through x