I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I’ve been there too, crying at nights until my eyes are all puffy. You need to remember that this is not about you, it’s his demons and his mistakes. I think it’s important in this situation to start focusing on yourself and your kids. As hard as it is to accept, he is not your responsibility, you can’t make it do anything he doesn’t want to. He has to want to change himself. I’m here if you need to talk anytime
