I started reading the message boards because I had no clue what the hell was going on.
I couldn’t believe that someone could say they loved you and then behave that way. You have to learn not to take it personally but that is so hard! You can’t help it.
I literally had no experience of drugs and I wish I never had.
I felt so betrayed but I do hang on to the fact that there were some amazingly great times between the binges and the final descent into full addiction.
I found him talking to me (but himself) in the garage at 1am one night and then hiding behind the bins as he thought people were going to shoot him. So almost positive that he was in the beginnings of psychosis.
There was no reasoning with him at the end; his addict mates had full control of him. They both were homeless and took full advantage of him that was absolutely heartbreaking to see him being destroyed at the same time.
None of them care about anything but drugs heroin/crack whatever they can get their hands on.
He used to get texts coming through saying “New Food on NOW be quick for best around tonight” and so forth absolutely degrading and humiliating but shows the power they have over addicts who they treat like idiots because that’s what Crack does turns your brain into a dead dark place.