Hi there
Read your post and I’m so sorry that you are going through this nightmare, especially with your son to look after too.
If you have found a needle, it is possible that he has been injecting the coke but this is obviously even more dangerous than snorting it. IV use is not for the faint hearted and represents a huge risk of infection including Hep C and HIV. Whether it is more than coke or not, it really makes no difference because the end result for you is just the same. My ex boyfriend is a heroin addict and the not eating and lying in bed for days does sound like it could be that horrible drug. They don’t answer the phone because they are in their own little world of oblivion where you mean absolutely nothing and nor do they even stop to think about how their selfish behaviour is impacting on you.
I know you have a son together and having the strength to kick him out and break
up the family is a huge decision. But trust me, as hard as it may seem to make that choice, the welfare of both yourself and your son is the only thing that matters when living with a partner abusing drugs. When in active addiction, they only care about their next fix and not only do they contribute zero to the household bills, they also ponce every last penny from you. You are bringing up a child that clearly you love very dearly. Children are far more perceptive than you realise, even at a young age and your anxiety will impact on your son. If your partner is using needles now, his addiction will spiral rapidly out of control and you cannot afford to have needles in your house when you have a child there.
My advice would be to pack up his bags and move on for the sake of your own mental health and the welfare of your son. It will be hard in the beginning, but what are you gaining from him staying with you in the house? Life is so short and believe me, if you continue to remain in your current situation, your mental health will deteriorate and like many of us on this site, (if it hasn’t happened already) you may never be the same person again.
Do his parents know about his addiction? Do your parents know or are you, like many of us on here, too ashamed to talk to anyone about it? Feel free to talk to me at any time, I spent over 5 years with my ex and I have nearly lost everything because of my inability to see what was right in front of me over and over again. Round and round in circles, getting clean for a very short while (allegedly) your heart bursting with hope and future plans then bam back to square 1 again … soul destroying and emotionally exhausting. So many promises but their actions completely contradict everything they say. And with addicts, words are so very cheap!
This is a great forum and reading other people’s posts has made me feel so much more positive and determined never to put myself in that position again. I’m here if you want to chat but in the meantime please just think about the well-being of you and your son. Be strong for both of you and you will make the right decision. Like many on this forum, getting away from the chaos gives you a chance to really think about you and what is best for your little family. Take good care x