Absolutely. Before my brother got ill I was firmly in the ‘addiction is an illness’, compassionate camp. But seeing their behaviour up close can test that theory, especially when they’re treating elderly relatives terribly for example. Having therapy has helped me feel less guilty about these thoughts, and that it’s ok to be angry and frustrated with addicted relatives.
I suppose with physical illnesses, people still have to stick to treatments, and to want to get better. I have clinical depression (not helped by my brother, sigh), but I’ve got better at managing it with self help, meds and therapy. I feel that I’ve taken responsibility for my illness, and it can still get really bad, but I put effort in. I get frustrated with my brother having the option of getting help but not taking it up. Even if it’s just going through the motions of logging into an online meeting and trying the ‘fake it till you make it’ approach.
So useful to hear from someone else feeling the same way