if she is not willing to open up and talk to you honestly, and take on board what you are saying.. she is still using. This is what they do. Invalidate your feelings. It’s called denial. Deny they have a problem, deny it affects anyone but them, deny that it’s harmful… it’s all the same pattern of behaviour. So, just break away.. for your own sanity and long term well being. She doesn’t sound anywhere near ready to stop using or even accept that she has a problem. And she may NEVER accept that she has a problem, so how long do you want to keep fighting?
Sorry if I sound … blunt… but I’ve been there and done it myself, and wish someone had said this to me when I was fighting. Now.. I can say I am in a better place. My partner has at least acknowledged how damaged he is and that he needed to help, and he is where he is, getting that help. But do I think he will stay clean when home? NO. All trust is gone. 🙁