Hi….just for background I am a widow of an alcoholic. So I understand only too well.
My advice is, this is affecting you mentally and physically ( just as it did me and would anyone in your situation ). I know all the shameful things they do.
This website did not exist when I was going through this. Thank goodness it does and that is why I’m writing to you. You do not deserve to have your life, your health and future happiness hijacked by a weak addict. Never mind the challenges of the addict. What about you? It’s ruining your life. Get out, leave, move on, move out.
Get out of the relationship, you are not responsible, it’s not your behaviour. Your partner never told you about this, believe me, it’s too much to deal with.
Get out and good luck!