Pambler, guilt is a wasted emotion and can only prevent you from moving forward. I am sure your mum would be happy with clean and sober, I know I would. The danger of being clean is always that you finally confront everything that has happened and all the emotions that go with that. Park those emotions, deal with them later and just concentrate on being clean it is the biggest prize for everyone involved in your life, there is nothing to be gained by looking back and beating yourself up. The place you are at now is what counts, nothing else. Every day clean wipes out every day using. Bridges can be mended, being sorry is an action, you staying clean is the action of sorry. You have to fix you before anything else can be fixed and I wish you all the luck in the world to remain clean. Xx
