Hey Fayzey . Am ok but big changes here .. we went on our family holiday , he craved through most of it non stop smoking and drinking as couldn’t get his hands on that junk . The day after we flew home he said he was nipping out for an hour or so and disappeared for 3 days binging , no contact nothing , when I finally heard from him – or I found him binging with one of his other coke idiot friends I told him this was it. And it is, our family home is up for sale , and I plan to start divorce proceedings in the not too distant future . I have a rented house lined up to go to with the children and home life with just us is calmer. But he’s still on his merry go round from hell , uses , isolates, hates ( esp me when high) comes off, crashes, cries, remorse, tries yo get clean can’t hack it and so does it all again – you know that script Fayzey.
Mine has also referred to rehab but he is only telling everyone around what they want to hear . Right now there’s no way he’s anywhere near recovery . I feel like i have deserted him if some ways- like I wonder ..did I love enough rather than just coped and fumed , but I think I’ve done all I could . Such a bad mental battle for us partners isn’t it – I will always have “ what ifs” I think .
I really hope yours is serious and it’s the first step for him . Do you think there’s a chance for you both if he shows he could be in recovery ?, hoping it works out for you but mainly hope you get your happy whichever way it goes xx