I was hoping I wasn’t right too Kulstar.
My heart aches and my head hurts. I feel sick and Im so tired.
I just want my husband back. I know I have lost him.
We don’t have children, but I know in my heart that If my mum knew she would be asking me why am I staying? And telling me I’m too forgiving, I’m too kind and I have to think of myself and what this relationship is doing to me.
I know the door to my parents is always open no matter what, I just feel like I have failed in another marriage.
My previous had multiple affairs and I was divorced within a year. (it must be my fault)
I’ve been married now for years but it’s been very hard this passed 3 years, with Covid and his use increasing and my suspicions.
I asked him this year about cocaine as I found it around the house and his attitude was so bad that I just hit out at him, that day was the worst.
Having my doubts confirmed, my heart broke into pieces. It was then that he said he used but only occasionally and always had.
He blames his mental health not the drug, I should have realised then that he was never going to give up but I’ve been there only to be lied too agin and again.
I think this is when my relationship changed as so Did my trust, he said he was quitting but never did and I keep finding that white powder.
Im so sorry for babbling, I don’t have anyone to talk too.
Thank you for your support, you do a great job. Thank you for being here on this site helping us all your truly a star.
Navy xx