I think the urge to use comes from the fact that it feels like forever since we stopped, and you believed that all the symptoms should be gone by now. So it’s frustrating when you still feel rubbish and just want it all to go away.
I had my codeine pills (still there) in my bedside table the whole time I was withdrawing, torturing me. Knowing I had the cure right there! Often I felt like taking some and trying the taper method, but I thought to myself what if that’s just as bad and I put myself right at the vey beginning again for nothing.
It’s certainly not for the faint hearted coming of these drugs, but we are doing it and we should all be amazingly proud of ourselves!