: Drugs, alcohol and mental health

Discuss the twin challenges of mental health and substance use

Drugs, alcohol and mental health

62 threads

394 posts

Genuine drug problem? by

Hi I am new to this forum. My partner drinks heavily and uses cocaine weekly (mostly weekends only) . He has done so for our entire relationship of 4 years and probably for a couple of years before that too. We are reaching the stage where we are ready to buy a house, have children and settle down. But i do not want to have children with him until he has proved that he can either control his alcohol and cocaine use, or has stopped completely. The biggest problem with his use is that he will 'pop out' for 'half an hour' and not come home until the following day, there will be no communication in this time, leaving me to worry that something bad has happened to him. When we discuss this issue, he says that he has a drug problem and he cannot control himself or stop himself from taking cocaine once he has had a drink. I cannot relate to this at all and i cant help but think that this is his denial of self control and personal responsibility. Especially as he doesnt do it during the week (and surely he would if he had a drug problem?). .. Am i being unfair? Might he have a genuine drug problem? Or is he just using 'i have a problem' as an excuse? I know its impossible to answer this question but if anyone has had a similar experience please get in touch. Thank you

Codeine Free Day 5 by

Looking for people in similar situations or have been in this situation in the past. I am on Day 5 of cold turkey and things are okay my body is starting to feel more normal, still a bit fidgety and uncomfortable but it’s manageable. The thing that’s annoying is the total lack of energy to do anything, especially around the house and with my kids I just can’t get myself off the settee and it’s driving me insane I’m usually a very active person. Can anyone say how long maybe before I get my motivation back or is there things people have done to energise themselves, thanks

1 post

Codeine addiction by

I’ve been addicted to codeine for about 4 years now, slowing increasing the amount I need to take over the years. I am now taking 300mg of codeine every evening and it really doesn’t even do anything for me anymore but I can’t stop. I often take more in the morning so could be taking in excess of 400mg daily. Writing this down shocks me!! I need someone to tell me what sort of damage I am doing to myself. I am so ordinary I never saw myself in this position!! I work in a highly professional job and I am fairly high up in my organisation, I have a family, and lead such an ordinary life! But this is like the dark side of me that I can’t talk about. I am sure if I don’t stop soon I will be doing some serious damage to myself! What am I doing to myself?

by Dadict

4 posts

Anxiety and Panic Attacks after Codeine Withdrawal by

Hi, I'm new here. I've just completed a medically-supervised detox programme to get off codeine. I was taking huge amounts (up to 30-40 tablets a day) and had been taking them on and off for about ten years. It was only fairly recently that I started taking large amounts - to start with, I only took the prescribed dose from my doctor. I've managed to successfully quit and although the physical withdrawal symptoms were unpleasant, I got through it, with the help of Subutex. However, the mental withdrawal symptoms are nothing short of horrific and don't seem to be going away. Severe depression, severe anxiety, panic attacks, feeling frightened nearly all the time and a feeling of impending doom that I can't seem to control. Is this normal? Has anyone else been in this situation before? I can't help thinking that I felt better when I was on codeine, but I couldn't continue taking such huge amounts of it. I just want to feel better psychologically and I don't know how long these horrible side-effects will last.

Alcoholic girlfriend by

Hi all, Well I am approaching a cross-roads and I hope the outcome is the road were my girlfriend becomes alcohol free leading to her, myself, her 3 children and my 2 children can look forward in life. However, if she does not become alcohol free it looks like I will have to not just break up with her but three amazing kids as well. How long do you wait or support the process of help?(how long is a piece of string) At the moment we are waiting for the appointments from the NHS for my girlfriends therapy (psychotherapy). She has resorted to drink from years of abuse from her parents and being raped, beaten and psychologically effect my two previous partners. At the moment due to the trauma my girlfriend has she goes into alcohol fuelled episodes where she gets angry but never directly violent towards me or the children but in the last 4 weeks she has thrown things at me and hurt herself. I have had to call the police twice and an ambulance for potential overdose. She attended her first meeting yesterday at a alcohol dependent group and she is in the severe category. There's more details but that's the overview. She drinks from 6pm to 12 pm, not saying this is OK but she does get through a large part of the day without drinking. I work long hours and have to manage the episodes for the last 6 months waiting for appointments from the NHS mental health services team. I work in london, travel 2 hours in and 2 hours back, usually waking up at 4:45am and getting home at 6:30pm. I had to deal with a bad episode last week where I said to my ex-wife I cannot have the my kids at home in a 50:50 split arrangement. Her children call me Daddy (Dad) and the reasons I have not moved out of her house is - - I want to give the therapies a try before concluding its over. - My girlfriend has no support, so 3 children could be taken in care without me. Meaning I would not have any rights to see them or power if it gets to that point with Social Services. - I love those children and I would have to move back 120 miles away. I will be limited to only seeing my children because due to the distance I can only do so much. - I worry that me leaving would be detrimental to her children, because their previous Dad cannot go near them. - When my girlfriend has no alcohol she is amazing women. Genius level of intelligence, caring, loving etc... So I guess I am hoping to see that version back. I have no support or told my family, I have never experienced this before and I am trying to figure out my where I am draw my line. It will be good to get other peoples perspectives so I understand what I should do. It may help me to understand I may have to take the heart break of splitting with my girlfriend and her children but I will feel like I am failing the children even though they are not genetically my children I love them and protect them like my own.

Homeless son by

My son is 21 and currently homeless. He has been using drugs from the age of 13 starting with cannabis and then in the last few years anything that he can get his hands on. He has lived in various supported housing due to poor mental health but due to his chaotic behaviour and violent outbursts he has been evicted many times. He literally lives from moment to moment and doesn’t care about his health as long as he can get high. He is very vulnerable and gets beaten up regularly by people he tries to sell drugs to or buy drugs off. I have to put in firm boundaries and hope that the more uncomfortable he feels the more likely he is to want to make changes. I work in drug and alcohol services as a recovery worker and see my clients that behave exactly the same way as my son and it goes on for years. Pain is a catalyst for change and I refuse to be a buffer for my sons rock bottom. It’s easier said than done and I feel really guilty a lot of the time but I know I am doing the right thing. I hope he will reach out to services that can help him and turn his life around.


3 posts

Alcohol Dependant Husband by

I’ve been married for 16 years but we are very much together only for the sake of the children. We sleep in separate rooms and tolerate each other most of the time. He is a heavy drinker and most nights falls asleep downstairs through drink. He doesn’t drink at work ( he’s a teacher) but has a drink in his hand from pretty much the moment he gets in from work. He is unable to see how much money he spends on drink and how his love of alcohol has ruined his relationship with me as well as affected his children. I plan to leave when the children are older ( They’re 11 and 15) but am struggling to put up with him some days.


3 posts

Help! by

My grown up alcoholic son us currently staying with me for a few days after being made homeless after a suicide attempt. I'm really struggling with everything. He's drinking in the morning. Usually cheap cider but I'm finding the booze as he has no money and is likely to suffer fits from withdrawing if he doesn't drink. He has done in the past .Me and hubby are treading on eggshells for fear of another suicide attempt. The last one was a serious attempt and he was lucky to survive. He has mental health issues and self harms badly. Anyone able to throw any advice my way? Thanks in advance


2 posts

Help for my brother by

Hi, my brother (42) has develeoped an addiction to alcohol. This has been building up over a number of years, since our mum passed 3 years ago he won't discuss anything with his family. He's isolating himself from everyone, and recently he quit his job. He spends most of his time in the day drinking and getting out of his mind. No one in our family can seem to get through to him. As he's currently living with me at the moment he sometimes disappears for days on end and I have no idea where he is. I'm scared I'm going to loose him. Does anyone have any advice on what I can do to help him? I've tried encouraging him to seek professional help but he doesn't want to know.


2 posts