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replying to Hox

Hello everyone. I have read every single post here.

I just recently got out of a relationship with this girl that used cocaine. She was in such denial about it its unbelievable. She had also all the signs. Moody, restless, constant runny nose, headaches, feeling ill, all of it. And often.

I was so inlove with her. And I tried to talk to her about it. Even mention all the things above. Tell her about my concerns. But she just deflected everything. "Its not that much". She made me paranoid and feel stupid. But my gut told me something was up.

I know for a fact in my heart she was using ALOT more than she told me she did. Not a day went without her blowing her nose and having these signs. She said it was a cold or because her being allergic to pollen. But pollen causes itchy eyes aswell as runny nose. And she only had a runny nose.

She also has two sons with shared custudy with their father also. Which makes this alot more depressin and sad.

In the beginning I understood that she was using and confronted her after a party we both went to. The day after I told her I dont want to be with her if she does coke. And she said she did go to addiction center and did tests every week. What i didnt know then is that addicted people play those test easy as stealing candy from a kid.

But the signs never stop. The nose, the mood, all of it. So I had to end it.

I had to break up with her against my will. Because I was so inlove it was crazy. I still am as I am writing this with tears down my face.

And soon after she got someone new already and she never understood my concern about her use or anything. I feel so betrayed and like a such a loser for falling for what she said to me. Please someone. I need support I am at a loss

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