Got to admire your honesty BT1978 and totally agree with you. When in the midst of addiction, anything/everything else goes out the window.
Addiction has common signs and symptoms - behavioural, social, physical, psychological etc.
No "addict" would choose this way of living, but by the time they take a look at what they've become they are in way over their head! Essentially they lose control of themselves, however they can choose recovery!
Perhaps for yourself Al anon might be a place for you to access some support, and guidance on understanding the nature of addiction, but also to help you to "detach" and learn new ways to cope whilst dealing with this.
It's heartbreaking and frustrating I can understand that, especially when dealers are hanging about the home environment. I can go into detail about the "role" of a dealer, but ultimately as the other comment said " it tells you all you need to know" he is obviously not in control and requires help, but sadly he would want to get help and sometimes that can takes a long time.
Rock bottom always has a basement. It's the devastating reality of addiction 😱