I’m really needing some help and support getting my head around this. I was with my partner for 3 years and didn’t know he was an addict.
We’ve just gone through one of the most stressful experiences where I’ve not completed on a house sale and had to move back with my parents. He had his own rented place but always lived with me and was rarely at his.
He had stayed at his a lot more and was acting really strange. I cried in front of him and he just watched me cry. I had tried to tell him how upset I was and it’s like he didn’t even care.
He then came back one day and I noticed he had a big hole in his nose which wasn’t there before.
I confronted him about it and he said there wasn’t a hole in his nose when I was looking right at it!
He then made excuses when him lying wasn’t making the situation go away. He then said it must have been his nasal spray that had done it then it wasn’t a hole it was a ridge off when he had dislocated his nose years ago. I’ve never experienced such obvious lies about something when the evidence is right there.
I then seen he’d transferred £600 to a friend he’d been with 2 days previously from his inheritance. He lied and said he had loaned money to a friend which I believe had been money for coke.
I’ve left him and my head is so so so messed up! He’s not been in touch or anything! We were about to buy a house together and we’d pretty much lived together for 3 years. He hasn’t fought for the relationship at all and hasn’t been in touch at all to even try and make things right.
This happened 6 weeks ago.
A normal person would have been trying to apologise or fight for the relationship and he just hasn’t. Is this what typically happens when someone is confronted about cocaine use?
I literally had no idea he was doing this but looking back over the relationship he often showed symptoms of withdrawal (tired all the time, headaches, sleeping too much, no motivation, upset tummies)
Please someone help me understand why he has done this and isn’t fighting to save our relationship or even contact me?