I’ve never really done this before but here goes:
I’ve been with boyfriend for over 3 years now and he has an alcohol and cocaine addiction.
We live together in my flat and he rents his house, so I always feel so terrible throwing him out as I know by doing so I’m making it worse as he feels more detached and turns to drugs but sometimes I just don’t know what to do.
I feel like an idiot for always believing his lies, even blatant lies I seem to rationale that they could be true.
I’m completely lost. I work all day and then my nights and weekends are spent trying to get him on wagon and uncovering his lies. For a few days I get so excited that it’s worked and see the man I love but then two days later I come home and he is drunk and I find coke in is pockets.
I am really at my last straw as it’s ruining both our lives but I also see the hurt he is going through in his eyes. It’s not like he is going out partying he is just drinking vodka whenever he can on his own and doing lines in the toilet or when I’ve gone to the shop.
He has gone to AA meeting tonight (but we’ve been there so many times). Im just tired.
Im 35 and want children so im scared I’ll end up in 5 years and I would have let him take all that from me as there is no way at the moment I would bring a child into this environment!
Any help or advice I would really appreciate.