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Posts by Debc


135 posts in 76 threads

Codependency and drug abuse by

Hi Jamie00785, Welcome to the Forum. You’ve done the hardest part by sharing your story on here, I hope you feel better for getting it off your chest. There is lots of great advice on the Forum if you go through all the different sections. There are on line zoom meetings that you could do, you don’t have to say anything, just listen, it might be a great help. You’ve made the first move, it’s little steps, but just try and carry on, one day at a time. Take care. Dx

How can I stop this? by

Hi CazD, Welcome to the Forum. Your words really hit home and I remember the constant going on and on, they don’t stop unless we give in, and I like you used to give in all the time, but it’s not the right thing to do as I have learnt. I think my Son (30) is playing at Recovery at the moment, he lives at home with me, he has a job which he earns good money from, so I don’t have to give him any now. My only thought about the money is why does he keep asking for money now? Is he still using? My guess is that the money is for this. I think you have to be cruel to be kind, turn your phone off when he is on a rant, and I know this will be hard to do, but you have to start thinking of yourself. Read the Theresa thread on here, there are lots of Mums, mostly with Sons who are addicts, it hopefully will help. Keep in touch on here, take care. Dx

Pregnant and my partners alcoholic by

Hi Eldex, Welcome to the Forum. I hope by getting it off your chest you feel a little better, it’s great to share your story on the Forum. I certainly wouldn’t be cleaning up after him, I appreciate that it is unpleasant, but next time leave it and make him clear it up. You will need lots of support once you have had the baby, and it doesn’t sound like he will be doing this, have you anyone else who you could rely on, family? And perhaps ask them if they could come with you to the Hospital, if they allow this in these uncertain times. Keep in touch on here and take care of yourself first. Dx

by Eldex

1 of 2 posts

Feeling so miserable and down by

Hi Delia, Welcome to the Forum where there are many people in similar situations. There is lots of helpful advice on here, the Icarus Trust also post on here at times and you might find it helpful to talk to them. I really feel for you, it must be so sad for you not to be able to spend time with your Mum because of your Dads drinking, it is no fun living with someone with addiction problems. Keep in touch on here, remember you are not on your own. Take care. Dx

1 of 2 posts

My partner and Coke by

Hi Smile, Welcome to the Forum, a great place to be able to share your story and get good advice and chat with people who are in similar situations. I am the Mum of an addict (alcohol and cocaine), doing well at the moment, but have lived through hell with him in previous years. Do you think your partner has ever stopped taking cocaine while you have been with him? I only ask because I know they are very clever at hiding things, and alcohol is usually a big trigger for taking cocaine. I think you have done the right thing by not being with him at the moment, it’s not a life that I would wish on my worst enemy. Have you noticed any other changes in behaviour over the years? Lies, money problems, chatting to other women, I’m afraid these usually go hand in hand with the addiction. Please don’t think I’m being harsh, but it’s better to be aware of these things, I certainly wish I had better advice some 12 years ago. Keep in touch on here and read other threads on the Forum. Take care. Dx

by Smile

1 of 3 posts

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