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Posts by Egg04

joined

3 posts in 3 threads

When do you say enough by

I wrote on here a while ago and since then things have sadly just got worse. My husband hid his addiction from me for god knows how long, I’m only now just learning how bad it really was...is. We’ve been together 8 years, moved into our first home last March and it was pretty much from then things started to go down hill, I believed he was depressed so we spent months getting him to the doctor trying to help him, it was only really this year that things hit rock bottom. In the last 6 months I’ve discovered the serious amount of cocaine he was snorting daily, the prostitue’s he’d been calling / meeting (claims never to have done anything sexual with any) and the huge debt he is in. In the last 5-6 weeks he has attempted suicide 3 times, last week being the worst where it resulted in life support thankfully he is recovering well, however he cannot remember anything from the past 2 years so everything he has done is just forgotten and now it feels like I have to just forget it as well. I have had access to his phone, I knew most things but since found he’d been speaking to girls he knew through friends etc. (They were decent enough to decline his offers as aware he is married) but he was trying to invite them to our home?! my question is though, when is enough enough? Whilst I love him dearly and I would never wish bad upon him, I just feel so confused. These actions aren’t him, cocaine much like alcohol alters your mind and rational thinking, I’m not making excuses by any means just trying to figure it all out. I feel angry that his addiction is stopping me from my life, I’m 29 we got married 5 months ago have our first home and dog together, life should be exciting, we should be hosting dinner parties, talking about starting a family, booking holidays. Yet none of it’s happening and I understand that isn’t all there is to life... I guess I just want normal as I haven’t had it for so long. I can’t quite remember the last time I was happy... I hope you can appreciate this is just a very short version of what has happened just some support or something would be nice

by Hox

1 of 6 posts

Cocaine husband I need some advice :-( by

I too am currently in the same situation. Been together 8 years I always knew he dabbled in coke on nights out with the lads etc, although he was aware of my disapproval and dislike he continued and I foolishly turned a blind eye. He stated his own business and everything was going well, wed just got engaged saving for our own place. Rewind to last March we moved in to our place and started planning for our wedding, slowly over the months it got progressively worse but I just put everything down to the stress of the business, cocaine didn’t enter my head. He stopped coming to bed at night saying he was doing “paperwork” he would come home late “caught up on a job” still naively never thought of cocaine until I caught him late one night in the office snorting it. We argued, cried made up (we know the drill) this became quite frequent but I never told anyone as I was so ashamed that my life wasn’t as happy as everyone thought, I knew they would judge and I guess telling someone would make it all very real. He stopped coming to any events with me, never spent any time together and yet I still carried on planning our wedding. We married in March this year and even the week up to the wedding we spent no time together and he wasn’t coming home. Our wedding night, we finally fell into bed and he was asleep almost instantly however he was VERY sweaty, I checked his phone as my gut told me something was off and I found he’d been contacting a woman who I found out was an escort. Since the wedding everything has fallen apart, the most unhappy of newly weds, he has contacted so many escorts but claims he has never met them just messaged them “for the thrill” I do now have my parents and his onboard helping me and have since told them everything but I just don’t know what to do. He goes to rehab tomorrow which is good, almost a sense of relief I don’t have to worry or care for him for 28 days. I just feel I’ve invested so much into our relationship but I’m scared deep down I can’t ever forgive him or trust him again. I’m so sorry you are going through the same situation, I really do feel for you. Xx

by Daisy12

1 of 17 posts

Husbands addiction by

I don’t know where to start, so much has happened in the last year. I’ll give the short version... Last year I caught my fiancé (at the time) a couple of times sniffing cocaine, believed him each time he said he was sorry and stopped. We got married in March since then it got progressively worse (or maybe I became more aware) cocaine was being taking daily, he wasn’t coming home, his business has crumpled because of this, he’s in a difficult place financially and I’ve now just discovered he has been contacting escorts. He goes to rehab tomorrow and knows he needs help. I know this person isn’t him but it’s so hard to deal with the hurt, lies and deceit. Anyone else gone through this or similar?

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