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Posts by Gil

joined

22 posts in 12 threads

Crack cocaine by

It’s awful so many are affected by this. I empathise with them but also they are the only ones who can stop this. I’ve been through so much the past 3 years and way too much to go into. I feel like I’ve done all I can we spilt for a while hoped me a wake up call was fine for a couple of weeks then it’s the disrespect, stonewalling, disappearing won’t answer phone, gives no explanation where who been with and then blocks me... it’s awful how to treat someone that way but I guess the problem lies with them not with us. I’m really lost, my heart is breaking I can’t talk to anyone about it as afraid of what they’ll say, don’t want to publicise our business. It’s just the total lack of disrespect and vileness I just don’t and can’t understand it. I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong and I’m treated as the one who has the problem 😢

by nelsall

2 of 30 posts

How to walk away from an addict by

I feel that the person I’m with is battling bad mental health problems and self medicating with cocaine and alcohol. Behaviour is irrational, promises the world then always lets us down. I love him but I know he doesn’t love me in the same way as it literally feels like he comes and goes on his terms, causes a row to score. Disappears for hours won’t answer calls and then ignores me for days, never an apology no sorry always me chasing and smoothing things over. He won’t get help for his mental health but continues on his cycle. Any advice would be welcome..

by YGZR

1 of 4 posts

I’m so upset not sure what to do for the best? by

Thanks for your reply. So I eventually got an apology 4 days later and told it would never happen again. But I’m not so sure...... he doesn’t remember the shoving????? and said he doesn’t remember much..... guess what! He’s been on it again this weekend blind drunk and literally packed his stuff up and left....not even rowed as such.... I’m adamant I’m not chasing him this time. He needs to sober up and come down off whatever he’s on and think about things as this is a constant circle and I literally can’t take it anymore....

by Danman83

2 of 6 posts

Advice & help please!!! by

Thanks for the replies guys much appreciated! He try’s limits the drink a few bottles then soon as weekend comes around it’s bottles vodka or gin! Posted another thread this evening I’m so upset, feel unwanted , unloved and just fed lies and treated with no respect. I have empty apologies and then it happens all over again. I’ve now stopped the chasing to as that was making unwell. The ignoring gaslighting it’s mental torture no matter how much of a mess your in. You don’t treat others like that! I question is he acutuallg ever going to change. I thought as he had a lot on previously it was driving him to due to stress. But I think there is far greater issues mentally and physiologically with addiction. As he sees it he doesn’t do it every day. And says people do it frequently at weekends. As almost to justify his binges cycle every 3 weeks. I’ve tried stepping back and the longest we’ve spent a part is a week and just don’t know what to do. We’ve planned so much in this year and some plans have already been broken. Just feel like I see a glimpse that he wants a straight happy family life and then next he’d rather hide himself away binges and then hit repeat apologies and making things up and then bang cycle repeats.

Boyfriend with cocaine addiction by

Hey so I’ve been constantly in this cycle. And I’ve decided enough is enough!! He’s vile and on a downward spiral out of control! So I’m stepping back I’ve given all I can! Hadn’t seen him since Wednesday I’ve had a few messages but they’re just vile nonsense! Last night he was quiet then about 10pm tried to pick a row over message to engage in convo. I know he’s been on it just by the way his messages. He’s a different person jackal and Hyde! 4am I woke up to two missed calls me being me worried called him back he was just silent on the phone I tried talking to him for 8mins asking where he was was he ok. Nothing then he hung up. Obvs mind does overtime called and called him till 5am. So I called to the house called the bell then remembered I had spare keys. Found him in bed he was alive so I left. Then vile messages have started again how dare i break in?! It’s time I start thinking and caring about ME! He’s in a vicious cycle and he has no remorse, no apology he’s been like this constantly for over a week! What I’m saying it’s super hard and I hear you! But if he’s not going to change then you can’t help guide your wasting your breath! Also it’s impacting your health anxiety and depression. No one should make you or I feel like that. It’s not healthy. Standing back last night I’ve noticed I’ve isolated myself because of the situation. And that’s not good either. I’ve always lived life and crazy thrown anyone who stopped that to the side! BUT this person has a hold on my heart that no one has before and it’s hard. So I know how you feel but it’ll strip you of your self esteem.

by MJ2021

2 of 62 posts

Husband addicted to cocaine by

Hi lexi, I really feel for you. I’m too in a similar position. Although I’m not married we don’t have kids we have a few between us. I’ve noticed an escalation in use in my partner who’s done this for years. However makes me think he’s was doing far more but his it better than he does now. They become selfless and selfish for it. I’ve read so much on addiction and they say it’s a diease and that they can’t stop once craving kicks in. Doesn’t matter about how much they love you or the kids everything else becomes irrelevant. I find that difficult to swollow. I think the hardest part is getting them to see there is a problem. Then suggesting help....im still at the problem phase. I get all excuses it’s not an issue I can take or leave it. I can control it.... it’s all lies, I’ve wanted to believe but it’s not true. It’s not daily use, co not co dependant but it’s now exalted weekly (especially on the weekends). Makes me sad as plans get missed, and the eventual come down, he turns to a lot of alcohol and moody vile kicks in. It’s aconstant cycle. Yours seems early so try to nip it in the bud maybe have a chat with him recognise it’s heavily affecting your family. See what he says. Suggest help avenues....

by

1 of 9 posts

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