Talk about your experiences with others.
joined 31 May 2020
110 posts in 17 threads
Really sorry for your loss. Can’t imagine how you feel x
Absolutely understand and it’s got to be yours.
What does your counsellor say?
I think for me. I was a never again person, once I found this out i was honestly horrified and shocked. Now we are further down the line, I think my husband always knew I would take the hard line and mean it.
I’m glad he didn’t push me into having to prove it, but I know deep down I would have be done if he failed even one.
Putting myself in your shoes and now being in your situation this is what I would do.
I would have the people who you have told (I have a small group of 4 people I have confided in) take the test infront of him. Then I would make him take it. Bingo answers there.
It makes me sad he thinks you are stupid enough to believe the test is wrong. That is so disrespectful to you. You know they aren’t wrong, but it’s easier to play along with him.
This is what you must decide... when is enough enough. For me it was black and white, from that first time I found out he was taking drugs, it was never ever an option to ever take them again and have me/our sons. Now I’m further down the line that is even more important! It’s cocaine or us. No one has both.
Thanks DOT, your comments on my story have helped me so much. To get a mans point of view and how he may be feeling.
I wouldn’t say our sex life is amazing, but it’s better than what I’ve had for years on end.
No I am more educated on cocaine and what it’s all about I know I should have known, but I wasn’t part of this world and I’ve had to get into the ‘know’ and fast!!!
I think if the person in trouble wants help then it can be done. If they don’t - walk away and don’t look back.
I honestly count myself very very lucky!
Hi Dot, really glad to hear that you are doing so well.
Glad you feel so solid and confident about not going back, that’s so important.
From the ex wife’s point of view it must be really hard not to hate you. I feel so much anger towards my husband and what he’s put us through. And still putting us through.
Must hurt her to see you moving on with someone new.
Glad your new partner is fully in the know. That’s so vital, vital for you to continue getting well!
I felt I couldn’t read and not reply.
I feel for you and can hear the pain in your words. Honestly sounds like you all have been living in a nightmare.
I personally don’t know of anywhere that he could be sent without his consent. I’d have thought it would be through a court, possibly being sectioned.
But I would say your mum has to stand up and do something now, she is enabling him and this won’t end until she cuts those strings. It will be another 6 years and you will all be in the same position.
So many posts I’ve read are of people who have done everything they possibly can... for partners/family and it all seems to end the same way, them shattered by these other peoples choices.
I hate drugs. I hate them even more since I’ve been dragged into this world. Only since May for me, but I have zero tolerance for it. It just kills the person that they once were!
Hi plain Jane, how are you? Have you made any progress?
100% agree with every word!
Lostbear are you there?
I saw these NA on zoom, they sound useful.
How did your snacks/evening go with the kids?
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