Talk about your experiences with others.

Posts by Lindyloo


679 posts in 225 threads

Help me by

Hi Tinker and welcome to the forum, I'm so sorry to read your story and I wanted you to know that you are not alone and there is lots of help and advice on this forum. If you read the other threads, there are people who are going through similar emotions with their loved one's addictions. There is also good advice from people in recovery who can tell you what the usual cycle is from an addicts point. The forum also has help available on their homepage and the Icarus trust. Unfortunately I don't have all the answers, but I wanted you to know that people care and want to help you. My son has addictions to alcohol and cocaine and I know from personal experience what it can do to a family. Look after yourself first and foremost and your children and accept all the help and support you can. Don't be alone in this nightmare, things will get better, but it definitely begins and ends with the choices that your partner makes. I hope you both get the help and support you seek. Always here to chat. Take care Lx

by Tinker

1 of 4 posts

Recovering addict partner - relationship stress by

Hi all Fitz, welcome to the forum. Im so sorry to hear of your troubles. You're in good company here as we all have a loved one with substance abuse addiction. I hope you find the advice and support you need, either from others here, or the forum home page. I wish you well. Debc , just to say it's been a good two weeks. Son is attending meetings again and spoken to sponsor. Fingers crossed 🤞 Hopefully you're having a peaceful time too. Lx

by Fitz1991

1 of 5 posts

Feeling at rock bottom.......again by

Spottydog, on a more positive note , 4 weeks ago I was really upset and sad with my sons behaviour. Fortunately in the last two weeks, he's been in aa and ca online and a a couple of face to face meetings. He's been in contact with his original sponsor and it's good at the moment. Fingers crossed it will continue. It's so difficult, as you feel you're walking on eggshells most of the time. I've learned a lot on the forum, people are so helpful and friendly. Check out Danman83 posts. He's is a person in recovery and gives a lot of good advice. I find little 5 minutes of meditation in Google resets me, for the day or night. I hope you find the peace and support you need. Take care Lx

2 of 4 posts

Lost in the vicious cycle by

Hi all Welcome to the forum Pineapple I've been reading your post, just to let you know that you're not alone in this. As Debc says, read the other threads too, you'll get advice and support from others in the same or similar circumstances. It is vicious cycle, and its very frustrating, and your emotions will be up and down constantly. What I will say is, look after yourself first and foremost. Google out some 5min meditations, look into Mindfulness, take pleasure in the little things. My son has restarted his online and face to face aa and ca meetings. So fingers crossed he won't lapse again on payday. Take care Lx

1 of 3 posts

Finally I’ve let go.. by

Irchem I have also said 'lost him to the devil' on many occasions about my son. Fortunately he's starting meetings again and speaking to his sponsor regularly so that gives me hope. It's easier to help them when they're trying to help themselves. It is an illness and every day is a battle for them, but you also have to do what's best for your situation as everyone's is different. I hope you and Heartbroken find the peace and happiness you need. Take care Lx

2 of 6 posts

What to do.... by

Hi Float Welcome to the forum. I'm sorry to hear that you've had such a tough time with your relationships due to addiction. It really does affect the rest of the family, and your emotions will be all over the place. My circumstances are different as in , it's my adult son with the addiction. I would suggest that you read the other threads from wives of addicts who have children. You can get a lot of help and and advice from others. Also, there are recovering addicts who are very helpful too The forum's homepage can give you advice and support. At least he tried rehab, so he's admitted he needs help, and that's good. Unfortunately addicts can relapse off and on, as we found out with my son after he was clean for 3 months. First and foremost look after yourself and your children. You can still support your partner, but at least you might be better advised if you get support. I hope this helps Take care Lx

1 of 3 posts

New to me by

I think its good to have some extra contact with him. Eg Skype, video call. At least you would see him and see how he's coping. Perhaps look into what support is available for him should he ask for it, at least you'll be prepared. There are people in recovery on this forum too, Perhaps they could suggest some help. Danman83 suggested some podcasts and videos from recovering addicts. I'm sure he could google them. Online NA or C A meetings would help too. He'd meet others in the same situation. Its a worry when it's your child, but let him know you're here to try to help as best you can. Sending you hugs Lx

2 of 4 posts

Emotionally drained and frustrated by

Hi February Marie, I'm sorry I've just noticed your post. You were so kind to me when I first posted. Your son's situation is very similar to my son's more recently. We dont hear from him when he gets paid (functioning addict). That's a bad sign to us. Sometimes we news is good news. But what happened was he went on a right bender, was really ill, apparently had terrible withdrawal and had to get medication fro. Doctors. Do you know if your son is still in hospital? You'd think you would be his emergency contact and they'd have to contact you if he was really ill? I wonder if he's in a frame of mind to seek help after all this? Such a worry for you, there are so many other mums on this forum chatting and sharing (mostly sons who have addictions) Have you read the other threads? There's also some good advice from recovering addicts. The forum has help and support available too. Try to look after yourself, you are a good mum, our sons are making these poor choices, until they admit they have a problem and actually seek help, there's not much more you can do. Try some mindfulness apps, or 5 minute meditations, or headspace app. Find pleasure in little simple things, takes your mind of the rubbish stuff. Always here if you need to vent. Take care, be strong Lx

4 of 9 posts

Can someone quit Cocaine on their own? by

Hu Anniemac Welcome to the forum. We all share the same common ground, we have a loved one who is addicted to alcohol or drugs. Unfortunately I don't have all the answers, but read the other threads and there's advice and support on the home page. My son admitted he had a problem when things got worse. He took part in a lot of AA meetings and CA meetings. He'll meet others who are trying to stop, and if he's serious about it, he'll get a sponsor and they'll go through the 12 steps...Google it. There are some addicts in recovery on this forum. Danman83 and BT1978 are really helpful giving advice too. Read their threads too. I wish you and your partner well, but first and foremost he has to admit he needs help, and is willing to seek help . Good luck Lx

by Dre80

1 of 6 posts

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