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Posts by Lostgirl88

joined

14 posts in 2 threads

Heartbroken and need help by

Hey. Glad to hear you’re doing good! No I didn’t get any for him, he chose drugs over me so me getting it for him would be the same as if he cheated and me dropping the girl off to him. That’s how I see it anyway. Also I can’t be part of the problem, it is hard to refuse him though. He knows exactly which buttons to push with me. I am too scared to ask as I know he will shut me down. Anytime I have ever mentioned our relationship he ends up very irritated at me so I stay away from that topic. I do get the feeling he is using me but whether he is doing it intentionally or whether it’s because he trusts me and doesn’t have the capacity to be there for me in return. But I only ever hear from him (when he isn’t staying with me) when he needs help or wants something. My logical brain is telling me to walk away as I deserve better but I don’t want to leave him when he has very few people he can trust and I would hate it if me walking away pushed him to use more. I am from Southampton :) Thank you for saying he is lucky to have me, and don’t feel bad that your girlfriend isn’t the same you should be happy that you haven’t put her in the position I am in. I am a huge believer in meant to be and I am so sad because I feel like he is my person but drugs have ruined that and taken the chance away. I hope one day he will see this but right now I am just scared for him, scared he will die. As when he goes really off the rails he does turn to crack too. You have no idea how much these messages are helping. Yes summer.....so hard in this world to find things that don’t revolve around alcohol. Wish I lived in a different time.

Boyfriend left me to recover by

Hi Ladies, well he has gone again. Hopefully to better things as he has moved in with his brother, who called him in tears because he is scared he will die. Even though I know this is what he needs to do as his brother has told him he must stay clean for at least a month, I still was very hurt as he asked me to run all of his stuff to him and not so much a thank you for putting him up myself at mine and taking care of him in every way I know how. So now I’m left all alone, clearing up the mess and crying over my seriously bad financial situation right now. I have been referred to a psychiatrist too. Unfortunately addiction is a selfish disease. I am not who I used to be, I look awful, have gained weight through stress eating and was using drugs myself way too much in order to just stay in harmony with him. I have completely fucked myself over only to be left out in the cold again. I hope and pray that none of you end up at the place I’m in. Hope you’re all ok. Xx

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