Talk about your experiences with others.

Posts by directionless


8 posts in 4 threads

Cant bear any more lies by

I'm sorry you're in this position Primrose250. You sound very similar to me. Just like you, I find the lying the hardest - I can accept he has a problem but I struggle to accept him not being open about it when he's in the depths of his drinking. I've also been worried about him losing his job. He works at home so it's much easier for him to 'disappear' and drink, and I've wondered how he's managed to get away with it for so long. We had to tell his work about it when we eventually checked him into a rehab facility and he wouldn't be able to work for several weeks. They were shocked but very supportive of him, so I guess we were lucky in that respect. He also goes to AA, but just going isn't enough - the alcoholic has to work the programme and follow the steps. Do you think your husband is doing that yet?

1 of 2 posts

Long-term alcoholic husband by

Your partner sounds very similar to my husband in that social anxiety is a real factor in his alcoholism, as well as serious self-esteem issues stemming from his childhood. I hope you do find some support for yourself - if it helps, I found my local group on the Al-Anon website here: To answer your question - yes, sometimes I do wonder, but I can't dwell on that too much while I'm trying to focus on supporting him through recovery and having a 'normal' life. Sometimes easier said than done!

5 of 10 posts

Struggling to know what's right by

It is very hard Mnon when you are trying to support someone through their addiction. I've tried all sorts of things to help - checking him into rehab, locking the drinks cupboard, getting rid of alcohol from the house, having people over to 'babysit' him so he can't go out and buy booze - but none of these things matter because the addict has to want to change himself, nobody can do it for him. I noticed that you said you're the wage earner, so are there some boundaries you can set with your money so only you have access to it? If it's your money, you should be the one in control of spending it.

by Mnon

1 of 3 posts

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