[danman83]

Different things really.. the suicidal thoughts, crying coming down off coke.

I messaged my mum about 5am 1 morning coming down, crying and texting her telling her everything asking for help. I felt ashamed and a bad dad even tho i do everything for my kids.

At 1st for a few years i never really felt down after it. But then 1 year it made me suiciadal everytime i had it. I was walking my dog 1 day. And was crying on a field to my self. And i was going new york the next day.. i was clean that day. And i thought i shouldnt be like this. And went to the docs. Its made me depressed now i think. Plus when i look back id been doing it for 8 years on and off. If thats not a problem.. what is lol