Hi Dfh,
So sorry to read your post and see how hard things are for you . I’m glad that you have a good friend that you can turn to and the people on this site are really supportive because it does help to talk.
You must have to stay so strong to be able to provide for your family as well as support your partner but, as you say, that is very draining. So I was wondering if you would like some help for yourself. If so please contact us at The Icarus trust.
We are a charity that provides support for people going through what you are, having to deal with a family member’s addiction. We have a team of people who are trained and experienced and you be assigned to one of them if you make contact. Talking with them might help you see a way forward.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
All the best.