Hi Shift Addict,
You are not alone. One of the many reasons people take opiates are feelings of being alone, isolation, stress, unhappiness.
I would say I experience all of these, everyday. So we have a lot in common.
Our codeine addiction is about the same level – around 600mg.
My body will actually reject a higher dose – because this is really getting into dangerous territory.
My advice – is find someone you can talk to, it can be us here. Or maybe a therapist or even, like me I have a personal trainer who has become a trusted confidant. Its really helped.
I am naturally secretive so no-one knows the extent my addiction reached at its peak.
Today, I hope I am tapering down for the last time. The reason to believe this is that codeine gives me no pleasure, and also now seems to cause profound nausea and I also have trouble going to toilet – its affecting my nervous system.
For reasons of economy and speed. I have dropped my dose by half. I will now taper at 60mg/day. Today I am suffering because of that, but experience tells me this is transient, and 4 days for me is usually the worst period.
Can you bring yourself to plan coming off? Having everything you need to hand will help a lot. 5-HTP tablets, diarrhea relief tablets and vitamin B will help. Try to stick out your plan and when you feel low – get straight into the fresh air.
The bed way to taper is to try to keep your codeine level lower than normal but stable – for me this means splitting the usual dose over the course of the day – once morning, once evening. This helps with the rough wake ups that last 4-6 days.
Exercise also prevents you taking more tablets to feel better and messing your taper up. Its possible you might relapse, everyone does, but each attempt will harden your will – and there will be a satisfying feeling of progress as each days goes by and you stuck to your plan.
To to sort this out and hopefully everything else will fall into place. You have a job and a partner so there is much to be happy about – but working your way to a happy place is going to be easier opiate free.