Dear Blue Widow
I am so sorry to read your story. I really hope you have some support in real life. My husband is a cocaine addict and we are currently divorcing because I recently discovered he had lied about lapses and relapses and has enormous amounts of debt which he hid from me and I believe he will soon go bankrupt.
I am sure you have struggled for a long time and hoped for the best and had your hopes dashed. If you are like me it feels like someone else’s life, and it’s an enormous strain to deal with everything unravelling and and at the same time to deal with your own turmoil. I can’t imagine how terrible it must be if the addiction leads to death. Have you been to your GP? I expect that you would qualify for counselling. In the short term the Icarus Trust should be able to help you too. It is so much to bear. Keep well xx