I’m not an expert but firstly be assured you are not alone. You can always come online and find someone who will help, even if it’s only just listen.
You’ve taken the first step by getting help. Maybe taking 4 tablets at a time (any tablet) isn’t so good, but you’ve acknowledged that this may be an issue for you. Don’t be afraid to go back to your doctor. You know and have said you are taking them more for the relaxing feeling they give you and not for pain relief, so maybe ask your doctor for a mild sedative and reduce your pain killers to the recommended dose. Have a think about it. Also, PLEASE conside meditation. There are some great apps for phones and meditation is a BRILLIANT way to clear the mind and help you start to relax naturally. It teaches you that you are the important person in your own world and you have to look after yourself. Love yourself, be good to yourself and you will start to recover. I send you love and healing thoughts x