Thank you guys for replying. Danman83 your comment made me cry, it really hit home. I have been told by a few people I am too nice… I really do try and see the good in people I love. but again sheer guilt and disappointment that I can’t fix him. Just so frustrating that I am constantly being told by him that I am not doing enough to support.. how can I branch and help him if he choses to hide from me? Yes uses everyday, odd minor day he won’t. The most he has gone is a week, but that was replaced with drink which was even worse unpredictable behaviour.. I don’t know what is street value is but few hundred quid would be gone in 3-4 days.
We have an outbuilding, and he is doing bits and bobs but I know that’s his hiding place to do it…
One time he came back from being off it for a few days, things were going ok, he said to pop in for a drink with me ( I rarely drink and happy to have coffee etc) and we met with friends (they are sensible and know what the situation is) I had to pop back to home to sort things out and left him with them. Few hours later sadly he drank way too much and it was the trigger. He went and got some cocaine and bingo the vicious circle is back. Our friends was concerned about his erratic negative behaviour that afternoon. They even phoned up the next day to check if he was ok. We spoke about it and I said what upset you? He said nothing as such but drink was the factor.
I have even thought about a week away somewhere, but concerns are the mood swings, or when we get back he will go straight back to it. I think breaks away would only be a temporary fix. If we as a family had thousands to put him through rehab we would. I even mentioned in the past about moving out to help (when it wasn’t as bad as it is now) … but that’s now on the back burner as he wouldn’t be finically dependable. Sadly mine wouldn’t be able to cover it all.
Danman83 can I ask you this, I don’t mind about people having a relapse in a few weeks or months time… but how do I know if he is really trying to stop? Like I don’t know if I am being fobbed off. I have even suggested about signing him up for the gym to give him a new focus… but met with yeah it’s a good idea… but nothing, I guess his self esteem is rock bottom.