Yes I think we all need to stand firm together as a family and when no mean no that’s it. He basically throws a massive tantrum and it’s a horrid outburst so he can obtain what he wants.. mainly money.
Like he’s not here at the moment.. just been told now he needs to sort things out for work… this is what it’s like everyday for me at the moment. Sat here by myself. I do take myself out here and there, but I know specially with my family they know something is up and I am trying hard to keep face. I know they would be horrified what he has done and what he has put people through. I don’t want them to give him a hard time etc.
With you Danman83 sounds like you are doing great work and it seems you really are trying to conquer it. Feel a tad jealous, hopefully your girlfriend will start to realise how well you are doing. Sometimes it takes time for trust to build back up again.
I don’t want to throw abuse or insults at him as I don’t want him to feel what’s the point anymore etc. But everytime we try and talk calmly, it ends up heated as he takes it the wrong way and makes it all my fault! I don’t like shouting and always try and talk. He goes in with all guns blazing which I then react to… then I back down.
He even said what harm is it doing anyone with him doing it! I think REALLY? His bad temper doesn’t just stop with me, it’s anyone really takes the brunt of it.
Once he did admit he couldn’t believe I was still standing by his side… his friends have basically gone and given up on him.
I really do believe in trying in everything and not walking away… but boy it’s been really testing me these last couple of months. I did get somewhere to grow veg etc hoping that would be a way of him escaping… but not really interested. I gave him bits to do to help take his mind of it. He’s done that and basically not interested anymore. I have tried a few times now oh did you want to see how the plants are doing etc… I get the response of not really no.
I will def have to watch these videos, anything that can help him and me understand. As I said to him before I would come along and get the help with him as it would make me understand things so much better…
It’s strange as not knowing a situation of an addict before, I would of been like throw him out selfish you know what.. but actually going through it’s not as easy as that!
Even for me it took a lot of courage to ring or to even message on here. So I can understand his fears of actually admitting to someone.. hence why I said I would help him make the phone call I.e together, offering support so he didn’t feel worried.
Once he gave me his bank card… but he screams and shouts I have to give it back to him.
I don’t smoke or do drugs, rarely I drink. But if it meant I had to give up drink to help him I would!
If you ever need support aswell from the other persons view I will try and help. Thank you so much so far for replies it means a lot