scary when you start to read things etc its like a mirror. More and more people, friends and his family are finding out, I can’t protect or hide it now. An incident occurred the other day, what should of been a nice chilled out day for us just descended into major chaos. I think it was because he didn’t want to do it? So it was like he was trying to find the smallest thing for me to slip up so he could take his frustration out on me. Literally it was just advising him to watch out for something, and it was a full blown verbal attack. Going at high speed in a car and it was frightening, I got in such a state it felt like my mind kicked into some kind of adrenaline mode,It was the most awful feeling I have ever had. No one has ever reduced me to something like that. After we got back home, he was telling me I just needed to calm down, he dropped me off and he went off.
I was a wreck, uncontrollable crying. Again why have I been made to feel the bad person, why have I again tipped him over the edge
I have not been able to eat properly since it has happened, I feel my emotions are completely shut off and people are worrying over me. I feel guilty for talking about the situation but some people found out…. I am worrying and feeling guilty for opening up.
I did have a chat about the situation and it was almost I wasn’t being listened to? so frustrating. I can see why some people go out to the shops and never come back again……