Slightly different because my husband wouldnt come on holiday, but when I did go I got abuse by phone every day, he was angry, upset, making accusations. So I totally get you there.
I now panic and have anxiety every time I have to go anywhere, if he doesnt reply to my texts I think the worst, I feel sick the whole time i’m away. I want to go and do things, but then I wish I hadn’t bothered, because the anxiety is crippling.
I love my husband too, I cannot go through it again either. But if it happens I bet we will, because we will hang onto this current time, and be wishing that time back again. xx