Helpless,
My husband has a hole in his nose too, without being graphic he was blowing chunks out for weeks after he eventually stopped the coke. Thankfully its not right through to the otherside, but its pretty bad, and would have only got worse.
My husband also used to tell me that he wouldnt be controlled. Frankly I think thats the coke talking, as we as partners just want them to stop, so try to work out ways to avoid them doing it. Thing is, all that creates is resentment. Its like telling a kid they can’t do something, they then just want to. Like Danman says, he has to want to stop, and there isnt a thing you can do about it if he’s not at that stage. I’m not talking about a remorseful guilty moment, I’m talking about truly wanting to not be a slave to it.
Coke is about the worst psychologically addictive drug out there, you dont get the physical withdrawal like alcohol or heroin, but dont underestimate its power to keep an addict pulled in.
Hope your partner sees the light and realises the only person thats winning here is his dealer.
Sending hugs x